Sarah Speaks It

Today I was driving on a familiar road near my house and I had a flashback. I was in the car with my ex husband and my kids, headed to Applebee's. I was driving. I remember he was already in a bad mood that day. I turned a bit wide and was too close to the median for him. He got so angered at me and spit in my face. This memory caused a tear to fall from my face as I thought about how terrible I felt in that moment and what my kids had just witnessed. In the grand scheme of things, this was minor compared to other things he had done, but to me it was simply disgusting. To spit on someone is childish and highly disrespectful. I quickly pulled myself out of that terrible memory and placed my focus on what I have now.  I thought that my ex loved me, because I was naive. He swept me off my feet and swooned me into loving him only to destroy me. This happened over and over again until I plotted to get out. That plan took years to ensure my safety. All the while, I managed to play a ...

He held me tight And I silently sighed For the first time in years I felt safe, I felt protected I knew in that moment it was real I would never have to fear this man's touch As I have with the one before The past and the present are incomparable One is dark and ugly While the other is bright and beautiful A sudden tingle ran through my body From head to toe It felt like love Strong, safe, gentle, and bold It felt so right For the first time in my life Like completing a puzzle My body fit so perfectly in his My soul was at peace That one moment Made me see clearly That this man was made for me He's so patient Kind and understanding The Ying to my yang Have I really found the man for me? He took my breath away With only three words I was frozen for a moment Wondering why I still felt scared Again, he understood I wasn't looking when we reconnected As I recall, neither was he One year later, we're both sti...