Sarah Speaks It

I need to be loved, not saved And therin lies the problem So many people need to be a savior They miss the blessing in front of them My intuition never lies When I go against it, I end up teary eyed This makes my heart so heavy but my spirit strong I'm feeling a bit broken I'm sure that wont last long I just need to be loved I just need to be held I need to collapse in your arms Lay my head upon your chest Not speak a word Just lay in silence, with deep breathes Let my soul speak to yours And allow my mind to rest Up late into the night I crave this intimacy And I'm left to hug my pillow tight The tears flow and isolation sets in Eventually I drift away To wake up and try again You see, I am an extrovert and feed off of the energy around me Isolation doesn't suit me In fact, it makes my mind crazy

Standing at the window Watching the rain Brings a sense of peace Yet my mind is wondering Is there a man for me? Independent as can be Strong as a rock But I still want a man to love me To hold me and to listen To laugh and relax See I met this dude Cool as can be I'm feeling him and I think  he's feeling me Our vibe is chill Just need to be sure he's real I can tell he's guarded Which is what people expect from me The truth is I detached so long ago My heart isn't hurt now, just my ego I'm looking for someone who shakes my soul All the right moves, but that last nigga left me skeptical Swept me off my feet And left me in the cold My loyalty is true Trust me when I say I got you So don't be fooled by my tough exterior Deep down in there is a heart waiting to be secured I learned as a child I couldn't depend on another So I handle mine without a wink I move swiftly, had enough time to think  I w

I wasn't prepared I was crushed And couldn't figure out why Technically, you're not mine I should have been able to shrug it off And be just fine But it struck me deep inside I wasn't ready For that emotion to rise It was more than the need For quality time It triggered something too common In my mind See, I'm still a bit broken I try to hide it well My disguise failed And that guard fell I should have been just fine It made me think my heart Was over powering my mind I swore I wouldn't let that happen Not this fucking time It's how I always get in trouble Letting this heart lead the way I racked my brain all night long Was this a test or a sign I really felt like a pawn The game kept scrolling through my head Did I get played again?  And then as I was dancing the anger away It dawned on me the next day Yes, this triggered something from the past But more importantly I've grown to care f

You say you operate logically Emotion is dead to you My first thought was Damn I want to be like you But as time passes I realize neither is true You hide behind a mask Afraid to show that side of you The truth is hidden in the details you reveal Quite possibly subconsciously I see through it all I'm determined to break you out I want to be the one to climb your wall I've already lived that truth Unable to be vulnerable But I broke that barrier When I met you I'm patient and I'll put in the work Just don't have me waiting for nothing I wasn't interested in meeting anyone new Until I started talking to you I still have some fears It just seems worth it now The only problem I have is the lack of seeing you I knew from the start what I was getting I just never expected to care the way I do It's hard to connect on the phone I listen more than I speak I want to know every part of you You've never been t

Weight loss, then weight gain Lonely nights, I toss and turn This unrelenting hidden pain Inability to control my tears Mood shift from bright to blight Struggles to get out of bed Every day seems a constant fight Did you know this is what healing looks like? They say I have a new glow Behind the dark circles and weary eyes I’m glad that the glow still shows Shining through as a reminder That on I’m on the right path Through it all I smile, I laugh I can see a light at the end I know it’s just around this next bend The bends keep coming And I keep searching I keep moving forward And keep getting hit So much loss has been suffered Oh, but so much has also been gained Through the pain and dark, lonely nights I have found some clarity in my thoughts Survival mode has been disengaged I’m learning to let go and to feel each pain I’m learning to live with hope Cutting energetic cords I yearn for something more Finally after all those

As long as I have been in the military I have known that the NCO is the backbone of the force. This concept spans all branches and components of the military. You may ask what does that mean? I’ll explain in different terms. In a large corporation you have different tiers of employment. The same is true of the military. Let’s use a fast food chain as an example. You have the CEO’s (Officers in military) that make all of the big decisions and put rules in place. Then you have the specialists or consultants (Warrant Officers) that manage the computer systems, software, marketing, etc. Lastly, you have the “regular employees” (NCO’s) that serve, manage, cook, cashier, and keep the chain running. Without those “regular employees” the system doesn’t work, the company fails. The same is true in the military. All three categories are important and play a role, but the NCO’s are the bones of the organization. The decisions the officers make will no doubt affect us in some way, but we still ho